


too dear for my possessing

by illumynare



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: F/M, Gen, a lot of Carolina feelings mostly, almost yorkalina, but you can bring your own pairings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-05
Updated: 2017-04-05
Packaged: 2018-10-15 01:38:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 426
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10547852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/illumynare/pseuds/illumynare
Summary: The people Carolina has loved and lost (or not).





	

**Author's Note:**

> written for the RvB Bing War

Carolina loves York because he's everything she's not. Because he laughs when she wants silence, and asks when she takes. Because he cares about the leaderboard, but he doesn't understand the way _she_ cares—and sometimes, when she's with him, she doesn't understand either. Because he won't listen to her, but he follows her anyway. Because when she has no time for him, he waits for her, and flicks the lighter on and off.

She loses him because she's Carolina, and she will always choose the Director over everything she loves. (Until she doesn't.)

* * *

Carolina loves Maine because he's everything she _is._ Because he knows the precise ecstasy of landing a blow on target; because he knows how to vanish, how to be _consumed_ by the arc and the torque and the shuddering impact of a strike. Because, when she moves in battle, he can follow her dance without any words. Because she kicks him off the side of a building, and he knows what she means.

She loses him because Sigma burned so much brighter than she could, consumed him more completely than she ever could. (She loses Eta and Iota, because she loses him.)

* * *

~~Carolina loves Epsilon because he is bone of her bone and brain of her brain and because he is not good, just like her, he is walking that long road, just like her, and when he is gone she is she is she cannot she is—~~

* * *

Carolina loves Wash because he survives.

In the old days, on the _Mother of Invention,_ she loved him because he was her rookie and he tried hard and he followed orders. But now? She loves him because he lasts. Because he's _not_ hers. Because he levels a gun at her and then he comes back, helps lay her nightmares to rest. Because he survives the crash and survives Locus and survives the battle at the Temple of the Purge. Because he goes with her on the Pelican, up to the _Staff of Charon,_ and he comes back with her when her mind is gaping and bleeding with a hole that will never be filled again.

She keeps him because he's found reasons to live besides the Director's plans. Because, when she thought he was dead, he found people who wanted him to live. Because there are six Sim Troopers (eight, if you count the medic and the robot) who are his and will follow him into hell and back, and sometimes?

Sometimes, Carolina thinks that they are hers, and she has a home too.


End file.
